Infertility - A Personal Story

Infertility is more common than many people realize. In Canada, it affects 1 in 6 couples, making it a struggle that countless individuals face, often in silence. If you’re navigating the emotional rollercoaster of infertility, know that you’re not alone. This Infertility Awareness Month, I’m sharing my personal story — the challenges, the lessons, and the resources that helped me find a path forward with more grace and empowerment.

My Infertility Journey

As a Naturopathic Doctor, I thought I was well-prepared for my fertility journey. I had been diagnosed with PCOS years earlier, and I worked diligently to regulate my cycle. Before trying to conceive, I even paid for comprehensive fertility testing to ensure there were no obstacles. Everything looked great.

But months passed with no positive pregnancy test. One month became six, then a year. At the eight-month mark, the emotional toll became overwhelming. I found it increasingly difficult to be around friends and family with children. The joy I felt for them was mixed with a deep, aching sadness.

After a year of trying, we were referred to a fertility clinic. They repeated all the tests — bloodwork, ultrasounds, everything. Again, they found nothing and labeled it unexplained infertility. We were advised to try medicated cycles, then IUI, and finally, IVF.

What They Overlooked in My Fertility Journey

I wasn’t happy at my fertility clinic. I felt they were overlooking a very key piece of the puzzle for me – my period pain. I knew deep down for a long time that the intensity and severity of the pain I was experiencing was not normal. But because I was so functional for most of the month, even as a Naturopathic Doctor with a focus on fertility, I had convinced myself that even if endometriosis was there, it likely wasn’t that bad.

I still raised my concerns regarding endometriosis many times over. I was met with the same response: “if it is endometriosis, it won’t change our treatment recommendation of IVF”. This didn’t sit well with me, so I met with multiple other fertility clinics in Toronto, and they all reiterated that same message.

The Infertility Resources That Kept Me Going

naturopathic & integrative medicine

Luckily being a Naturopathic Doctor, I had many, many resources to turn to. I am exceptionally well versed in reading research critically. I also knew which Naturopathic Doctor I wanted to support me on my fertility journey.

When I took a deep dive into the research, it was quite clear that the success rates of IVF in endometriosis are very poor compared to other causes of infertility. We know with certainty that endometriosis reduces egg quality, and in some cases egg quantity; it impacts our sensitivity to important hormones like progesterone, and causes such significant inflammation in the pelvis that implantation is unlikely to occur. When I turned my attention to reading about excisional surgery to remove endometriosis, while research at the time was preliminary, it painted a much brighter picture. The success rates were better, especially when surgery was completed before the age of 35 years old.

My Naturopathic Doctor helped validate everything I had researched. She echoed my concerns and encouraged me also to advocate for a referral to a surgeon.

psychotherapy

At the same time, my mental health was deteriorating. I felt I couldn’t be around loved ones with kids. My partner and I dealt with this diagnosis in completely opposite ways. I also was dealing with constant medical gaslighting. There were many times I’d question my knowledge, education, and even just the pain I’d feel in my body.

Talking to a psychotherapist helped me process these feelings, set boundaries with loved ones, and regain confidence in my own body. It was a crucial step in feeling empowered to keep pushing for the right care.

Addressing Endometriosis, Not Unexplained Infertility

After many failed conversations with my fertility clinic, and on the insistence of my partner in a heated appointment, our fertility specialist finally conceded and referred me to a surgeon with a specialization in endometriosis.

A phone call was scheduled a few months later, and over the phone the surgeon was 100% confident I had endometriosis. I was scheduled for a pre-op appointment which revealed the endometriosis was likely quite advanced, and I was then scheduled for surgery.

When my surgery date finally came, it confirmed everything I had been feeling. I had deep, infiltrative endometriosis, and it had invaded other organ systems. It was severe. By some miracle though, it hadn’t invaded my reproductive organs. They removed as much as they could keeping my goal of fertility in mind.

A New Beginning & The End of My Fertility Journey

I conceived naturally just two weeks after my surgery. After what had been two years of infertility, I conceived in my first month of trying. I now have a beautiful daughter. When I finished nursing her, I conceived naturally again just two months later. I am happy to report that I am currently pregnant with a baby boy.

I am immensely grateful for my education, Naturopathic Doctor, Psychotherapist, and Endometriosis Surgeon who empowered me to make the most informed decisions for my fertility possible. Ultimately, if I had just followed the advice laid out by the multiple fertility clinics I visited, I would not be where I am today. I probably would still be going through rounds of IVF.

A Final Word

Everyone’s fertility journey and cause of infertility is different. But what my story is meant to show you is that asking questions, looking at your health comprehensively, working with multiple practitioners who can provide different viewpoints, and leaving no stone unturned is critical in this process.

I want to acknowledge that there are couples who still don’t conceive even when we look at this from all angles. But I strongly believe exploring every avenue, doing everything you feel you need to do to make this a possibility, will still bring you a sense of peace no matter the outcome.

If you’re struggling with infertility and you’d like to talk to someone about your treatment options, I invite you to book a free 15 minute consult with us here.